Unlikely Assistance
by Increasing Paranoia
Summary: Fargo happens to be at Cafe Diem when Jo meets Zane for their date. Noticing that it seems to be going badly, Fargo decides to step in to help Jo out. What he doesn't know is that by stepping in, he's changed the natural course of events.
1. Fargo

A/N: I don't understand why there's not more Fargo/Zane love. I'm attempting to remedy that.

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Fargo was sitting at the counter of Cafe Diem, sucking down a Vinspresso. Ever since Stark had become head of GD the young scientist had found his workload substantially increased. Not only did he have his own work to take care of but he had to have whatever Stark required at his fingertips. A lesser man might have cracked under the pressure – and Fargo certainly found it a challenge – but he had big things planned. After all, he had a family name to live up to. So he sucked down his caffeine while he waited on his lunch and just happened to see Jo greeting her potential new boyfriend.

"Wow," the new scientist stated as he greeted the deputy. "If all church girls looked like you, I might consider converting." As much as Fargo hated to admit it, that was a pretty impressive line. And Jo did look absolutely gorgeous in her white dress.

"Well, you should join me sometime and find out." Jo stated, grinning. Was it possible – was Jo actually being civil?

"Oh, I would, but I'm allergic. I'd have to get a new inhaler. It would be a whole thing." The man stated. Fargo bit back a grin, this guy was pretty funny. Jo made a noise which Fargo assumed was an 'uh-huh' and the man motioned to the table he'd been sitting at. "After you."

"Chivalry. Not something I was expecting from a felon," Jo stated, moving past the man. Fargo raised his eyebrows. Ah, so this must be Zane Donovan. And lost in his own thoughts, Fargo missed what Zane had replied. Something about never being convicted but the day still being young. "Try anything and I'll deviate your septum." There was the Jo that Fargo knew.

Fargo missed part of the conversation as Vincent served up his omelet. Still, he was intrigued about how things were going with the pair and he'd be lying if he said he wasn't interested in learning more about Eureka's newest addition. So he stealthily moved to a table close enough to overhear conversation without blatantly eaves-dropping.

"Actually," Zane was stating, "MIT was great. I could spend weeks at a time focused on a single variable in a lattice gauge equation. It was heaven." Fargo could understand that feeling. Apparently, so could Jo.

"I had the same feeling assembling a chromium flash suppression barrel for my grenade launcher," Jo stated, a small smile of happiness on her face.

"Yeah," Zane nodded, not looking overly impressed. Fargo got a sinking feeling. If Zane wasn't careful he was going to blow this. "But that's simple mechanics. Particle and theoretical physics?" he asked as he leaned back in his seat. "That's the real mind candy." Fargo swallowed a groan, noting the look on the deputy's face.

"Well, some of us like practical application," she stated, her eyes not quite meeting Zane's. Realizing that he'd inadvertently insulted her, Zane was quick to back-pedal.

"Oh, yeah. No. That's all good," he backtracked, leaning forwards. But, I mean, let's be honest. That particle accelerator? It only gets built after someone comes up with the idea. Right?" he asked. An awkward silence fell over the table and Fargo felt for Jo. She had no idea what to say and although Fargo might have enjoyed the entire date failing (he still wasn't over his crush) he could tell that Jo really liked Zane. And besides, only one of them should have outstanding bad luck in love and Fargo held the record. Pulling out his tablet, he quickly scrawled an answer before subtly holding it up and waving to get Jo's attention. Her eyes flicked over to his seat and he pointed to the tablet. A small smile of gratitude appeared on her face and she turned her attention back to the scientist in front of her.

"But how would you even think of coming up with the idea of a particle accelerator if there wasn't a practical use for it?" she asked. "Would anyone have thought to create a particle accelerator if all you scientists weren't trying to understand particle physics? I mean, the fact that they can be used in televisions and cancer treatments is all kind of beside the point – not the true objective," she stated and Zane raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, you've got a point. No one was looking for a cure for cancer when they created the particle accelerator," he ceded, taking a sip of his drink. "Still," he continued, "a lot of our most historic breakthroughs in science come from accidents. I mean, Fleming discovered penicillin by being a slob," Zane laughed. Jo chuckled as well before shooting a pleading look over Zane's shoulder to Fargo. The look clearly read, _How the hell do I respond to that?_ The scientist quickly scrawled on his pad before subtly tilting it towards Jo.

"Well, think of how the world of fashion would have suffered if Perkin hadn't been trying to discover a cure for malaria?" she stated, hoping that she pulled that off casually enough. Fargo grinned and gave her a thumbs-up.

"Yeah, I don't know what I would do with my life if the color mauve had never been invented," Zane joked, grinning. Fargo took the opportunity to roll his eyes before scribbling a rebuttal on his tablet. If the other scientist wasn't impressed with the discovery of the color mauve, he should be impressed with _this_. After all, it was his baby.

"Fine," Jo ceded, glancing at Fargo. "How about the discovery of the Big Bang? If Penzias and Wilson hadn't been using an antenna to get signals from the Milky Way they never would have heard the echoes of the _first_ Big Bang." Zane hung his head in defeat and Fargo allowed himself a small smirk. "How did we get on the subject of accidents anyway?" Jo asked.

"Particle Accelerators," Zane answered and they both laughed. Jo took the opportunity to give Fargo a thankful look and the scientist nodded, digging out his wallet and leaving the appropriate amount of money for Vincent. "Any particular reason you keep looking over my shoulder?" Zane suddenly asked and Fargo froze, head whipping toward Jo. _Say no, say no_, he begged in his mind.

"Maybe there's a cuter guy behind you," Jo responded and Fargo took the opportunity to scurry out the door.

"Cuter than _me_?" Zane asked indignantly and Fargo barely made it outside before laughing at the absurdity of the entire situation. Back inside, Zane and Jo's date continued – undisturbed by Fargo's exit. "I really enjoyed this," Zane admitted and Jo felt a tug on her conscience.

"Look, Zane, there's something I have to tell you. If you enjoyed this entire conversation then you should be talking to Fargo," she confessed.

"Fargo?" Zane asked, confused.

"Yeah, Doug Fargo. If you had just been talking to me, I would have been out of here as soon as you brought up the particle accelerator because quite honestly, I have no idea what that has to do with _anything_. But Doug was sitting behind you and he was coaching me because I guess he could tell that I really do like you. The point is everything out of my mouth from particle accelerator onwards was all Fargo," she finished. Sighing heavily she collapsed in her seat.

"I...don't understand," Zane stated. "Why would you lie?"

"Because...I figured it wouldn't be long before you figured out that I wasn't as smart as everyone else in town. Carter and I, we're not science smart. I can do practical applications for my weapons but theory and brain-storming and all of that...I'm useless. And hearing people talk about it makes me feel like a complete idiot. And I really wanted this to go somewhere," she stated, motioning between the two of them. "But I can't keep up with you. I'm sorry," Jo apologized, standing and exiting the cafe. Zane remained sitting as he tried to absorb everything Jo had told him.

"Everything alright?" Vincent asked.

"Who's Fargo?"

~Review~


	2. Jo

A/N: So...finally got around to updating this. Obviously, the first chapter was Fargo assisting Jo on her date with Zane. The following chapters will have different Eureka characters "assisting" Zane in his courting of Fargo. Feel free to leave comments with the characters you want me to use. Enjoy

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Zane had to admit that ever since his failed date with Jo he hadn't given much thought to the mysterious Fargo. His friendship with Jo had taken off and he had his hands full with moving into his house and getting settled at GD. He had gotten a brief description of the other man from Vincent and he had been informed by Jo that a new bet had been opened in the cafe owner's book – right next to the bet concerning Stark and Carter. It pissed Zane off a bit – he hadn't even met the guy yet! Worse yet, he hadn't even gotten a good look at the guy. The other scientist was like a ghost the way he flitted through the halls of GD. The poor man looked like a nervous wreck between Stark bellowing for him and all the sexual tension being thrown around by Jack and Nathan. Still, it's hard to develop feelings for someone you only saw for seconds at a time and Douglas Fargo was the furthest thing from Zane Donovan's mind until The Party. And yes, the capital letters were required.

Zane had been minding his own business, keeping an eye on the Sheriff's daughter while she gossiped with friends and made lovey-dovey eyes at her boyfriend. At some point he had found himself shoved inside the closet with Jo for the latest rendition of 7 Minutes in Heaven – and wasn't it embarrassing when the good old Sheriff found them while he had Jo's tongue down his throat? Still, it had let Zane know definitively that there could never be anything more between them. Jo was pretty and feisty and everything he wanted but she wasn't what he needed. And then in walked the elusive Fargo. The man Zane had only ever seen tripping over himself walked into the bunker with a steady stride, cool confidence and a plan to hack GD. And suddenly Zane took attention.

Hacking GD with Fargo was...fun. Especially with Fargo's childish glee whenever he managed to outsmart the building, which Zane had to admit was fairly often. Not to mention he was giving Zane a run for his money when it came to hacking abilities. Oh, yes, he definitely needed to devote more time to the study of Fargo. _After_ they finished saving Stark and Carter.

Zane knows the _exact_ moment Jo tells Fargo the truth. They've just managed to save Eureka – _again_ (and Zane wonders how often imminent danger comes, because that's twice, now, and he hasn't been here that long) – when Jo tackles him in a hug before turning and giving Fargo a gentler hug. She whispers something in the other scientist's ear and Zane watches as Fargo's eyes widen and his face pales. Zane takes that as his cue.

"So you must be the man I've heard so much about," he stated as he moved forward and shot the other scientist one of his killer grins. He had to fight to keep his grin from widening when the bespectacled man flushed.

"Yeeeeees... If you'll excuse me, I should really get to GD and see what went wrong." And Fargo all but fled. It would have been easy to leave things there and pick up where he left off with Jo. But Zane was never one to do things the easy way and he threw himself heart, body, and soul into whatever had his attention. And Douglas Fargo had his attention. Zane grinned wickedly. Fargo would never know what hit him.

* * *

Zane was pretty sure he was going out of his mind. No matter what he did to try and get some time with Fargo, the wily little bugger was always ahead of him. If Zane was entering a room, Fargo was exiting. If Zane turned down a hallway it was only to see Fargo turning around a corner. If he didn't come up with a plan of attack soon he was pretty sure he was going to just break down and ravish the other scientist. Fargo didn't seem like the type of person who would enjoy that without at _least_ having dinner first.

It was actually Jo who first gave him the opening he needed. They were all stuck in a room, debriefing after the latest debacle when the deputy turned to the smaller scientist and asked,

"You going to Spencer's movie night?"

"Movie night?" Zane asked, intrigued. Fargo looked like a deer caught in headlights and at Jo's grin, Zane just _knew_ it would be the perfect opportunity to talk with the other scientist.

"Yeah, Spencer has a get together every week to watch movies. He's got a killer set-up, Vince brings all his best snack food and we watch whatever movie Spencer got. You should totally come. Spence won't mind at all!" She grinned at him. Zane grinned back before noticing Fargo's discomfort.

"Ah...no, I don't want to intrude on your guys' night or anything," he stated as he shoved his hands into his pockets and shrugged his shoulders. There was an awkward silence before Fargo heaved a sigh.

"No, it's fine. You should come," he sighed as he looked down and adjusted his glasses. Zane gave a cursory shrug as if to say, '_I don't want to be a nuisance_.' "Really," Fargo reiterated. "We'd love to have you." And suddenly it was like their roles were reversed, with Fargo chasing Zane and Zane playing hard to get. Zane hid his smirk.

"Well...if you're sure..." he trailed off before looking up at Fargo from under lowered lashes. He hid another grin when Fargo flushed and looked away but he nodded his agreement and Zane sent him a small, honest smile.

Which is how he found himself sprawled next to Fargo on a small couch with Taggert, Jo, Spencer and Vincent sitting in various chairs around Spencer's trailer. Spencer had managed to bootleg the latest horror movie and Zane was thoroughly enjoying the way Fargo would jump and lean into him whenever something scary would happen onscreen. He casually draped an arm around the back of the couch but made no further move to encroach on the other scientist's space. He could be a gentleman when he wanted to, he'd just never had a reason to before.

"Awesome movie, as always," Jo stated as she gave Spencer a quick hug goodbye.

"Thanks again for letting me join in on the fun. It was great," Zane told the young scientist, giving him a quick but firm handshake.

"So we'll see you next week?" Spencer asked.

"Totally," Zane grinned, keeping one eye on Fargo as the bespectacled scientist tried to make a quick get away. "I'll see you," he stated, throwing a wave to the others as he subtly followed his latest interest. "So what did you think of the movie?" he asked as he caught up. Fargo gave a small scream and flailed before tripping and sprawling on the ground. "You okay?" Zane asked as he helped the other man up.

"Geez, give me a heart attack, why don't you?" Fargo demanded as he straightened his glasses and stood up.

"I'm sorry, I keep forgetting you're such a jumpy little guy," Zane told him with a laugh. "Aw, don't scowl, I think it's cute," he admitted. Fargo scowled again but it was tempered by the blush and Zane was beginning to think it was his favorite look on the other scientist.

"Look, what do you want?" Fargo asked tiredly. Zane shrugged.

"I can't just want to talk to you?" he asked. He watched as Fargo sighed and shook his head.

"Nearly stalking someone isn't exactly talking," Fargo pointed out irritably and Zane grinned and laughed. The other man wasn't exactly telling him to get lost. He grinned as he pulled out the ace up his sleeve.

"Well, you haven't exactly made it easy on me. I think Buffy had an easier time slaying vampires than I did of getting you to talk to me." He noticed the shift in Fargo's posture immediately.

"You watch Buffy?" he asked suspiciously. Zane was beginning to think the man was naturally suspicious but he kept that thought to himself, instead shrugging and keeping his eyes on the smaller man.

"I watched the first two seasons. Kind of fell out of the habit when I was on trial and never got back into it. Maybe you can help with that," he said, grinning at the look on Fargo's face. You would have thought he'd insulted the man's mother.

"Just what were you being tried for?" he asked. Zane shrugged.

"Watch some Buffy with me and maybe I'll tell you," he countered. Fargo looked away as he thought over Zane's offer and the taller man knew that Fargo was making a list of pros and cons regarding his offer.

"Alright," Fargo sighed. "I've got off next Wednesday, we can watch some episodes then." Zane nodded his agreement. "I can't believe you never bothered to finish the series," he muttered as he walked away. Zane grinned widely behind the smaller man's back before turning to head to his house. He needed to think about what to get Jo as a thank you gift. Whatever he got her, it definitely wouldn't be lingerie this time.

~Review~


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